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Sunday, July 15, 2012

A Dress Policy Needs to be Instituted *SMH*

Normally I don’t do a lot of complaining here about different things, but as I stated earlier, I am a bundle of pregnancy hormones lately.  So here it goes…

Swimming pools need to have a dress policy. I don’t mean to be RUDE or mean here, but really they do.

I took my kids (Serina, Alex, Kennith, Maddy) and my niece and nephew to the pool yesterday for Maddy’s 3rd birthday.  My mom and Phillip also went. Normally everything is fine and dandy, but it appears that yesterday was the day for “flaunt your stuff if you got it… and even if you AIN’T got it.”

I am very humble and I know I don’t have a picture perfect body (not even in my dreams). I used to be 355 lbs, and now I am wrinkly. I do my best to cover up EVERTHING I can while at the pool, including my upper thighs. Oh kids, those thighs look as if they belong to a 90 year old. I do not even wear shorts because of how beautiful they are (note sarcasm).  I mean, I want to spend time with my kids but I don’t want the rest of the pool to run screaming as if it were a bad horror movie. (yes, the thighs are THAT bad.)

Anyway, as I digress, yesterday at the pool there were so many women who were wearing bikinis that hardly covered ANYTHING up. Breasts and butts hanging out… and I felt so uncomfortable that I wanted to cover my son’s eyes. When did our society lose dignity? I mean, don’t they have any honor or dignity left? It is ok to be proud of your body and love it, but do you have to show it to the world? We may not all feel the same way about your exposure. Just saying.

And, really? When did it become appropriate for a 10 year old girl to wear a string bikini to the pool?

Dress appropriate for your age and body structure. That is all I ask. I don’t want to explain to my son why the woman who is in the chair relaxing has a BREAST halfway out of her bathing suit (yes, this is the case of the future melanoma victim sitting next to us. Her nipple was showing.)  

Furthermore, they have dressing rooms in the ladies locker room for a reason. I don’t want to see a 26 year old’s naked lower parts, and really she was a larger woman who wore a bikini and bore WAY more than anyone wanted to see… I am happy she is proud of her full figure (you go girl), but there is appropriate swim attire and non-appropriate swim attire…  (AND, and her kid pooped in the pool, and she laughed… so moral scruples are not her fortay.)

In this instance, I take the advice of Marilyn Monroe. The sex symbol for all generations….

Marilyn Monroe --- “Your clothes should be tight enough to show you’re a woman but loose enough to show you’re a lady.”

So, this snarky post leads me to my next idea… pool blinders for young boys. I wonder if I can A) Make them and B) make them water resistant.

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