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Wednesday, September 11, 2013

A Talk to Remember

Today marks the 12th anniversary of 9/11/01.  I cannot believe it has been 12 years since that very day.

For a lot of you who know me, you know that I can close my eyes and see it, hear it... even smell it. For all of us who remember ---we remember where we were, who we were with, even some of us remember what we were wearing, or what we had with us. I was wearing a grey dress, and I had my family scrapbook to show to my works friends...

Today as the 9/11 footage came on the morning talk show, I decided that this would be a good time to talk with my 9 year old about the day... and more importantly, about my story.

He and I talked about terrorists, who they were, why they did it, and that even though they did it in the name of their religion, their religion doesn't practice that kind of cruelty or hate.  He understood...

He started to get sad for all of the people who died and their kids... and then he cried... I cried, and we just held each other...


we talked about 9/11 miracle stories... you know, the ones of the people who were supposed to be there but they had a freak accident.  Like the chef at Windows of the World who broke his glasses and ran down to the mall in the basement to get them fixed... Like the employee whose daughter started kindergarten that day, so he took the morning off... a lady who worked on the 74th floor who got delayed at the cosmetic counter in the basement... the couple who stopped to shop at the outdoor market for fresh baked goods... about a random train that stopped dead in its track because a crow flew into the electrical part and stopped it...

I told my son, on that day a tragedy occurred, but there were also mini-miracles. Lives spared without thought... and hard to explain or even fully comprehend the WHY part, even 12 years after... There have to be reasons why these people lived... why they were spared.

He said, "I know.. to do good things." I said, "Yes.  To do great and wonderful things..."

I then told him about my experience on 9/11... where his dad was, when we finally found each other... the fact that I cried for days and days afterwards.  I told him that I knew it was going to be ok because after it happened all I could do was start singing to God... my kind of prayer... and as I sang, I felt more confident that He was protecting us.

Some people may not believe in God... they may not know that blessings and miracles happen every day.  My life is one of those miracles.... MY KIDS are miracles.  I truly believe that I was protected that day and pulled out of harms way, and NOT by accident.  When you walk by faith (and not by sight can I get an AMEN) you walk in His love, His protection... You walk in positivity.

Today I remember those we lost... I celebrate my life... I never will forget or take it for granted.  I celebrate having a child with a compassionate heart... I celebrate the fact that I get another day on this Earth...

So, silly as it sounds... Being a person on the train that got taken out by a crow on 9/11... I got a tattoo a few weeks ago as a symbol of my gratitude... Here it is!  A cross with the wings of a crow setting it free...

Thursday, September 5, 2013

I Get it NOW. I Mean, I REALLY Get IT!

Hello, sunshines and happy Thursday!

This week has been an emotional roller coaster... Monday we brought home Rosie, a beautiful miniature dachshund who is absolutely amazing.  It was by chance that we acquired her and she is a loverly addition to our family.

Tuesday we spent at the university hospital with Madelynn.  She has become very aggressive and I think it is the medication doing it to her.  I have approached her physician on more than one occasion as to the behavior changes after starting on the medication they gave her for her thyroid.  So before this appointment I went in armed. Armed with what?  Knowledge from research and the word of God kind of armed.

Anyway, when we were at the doctor's appointment Madelynn all of a sudden turned on me.  She got mad and she hit me, bit me, scratched me on the forehead, and she started to scream uncontrollably. I asked the doctor if there was another medication we could put her on, because she the aggressive behavior started after the medication started... she said to point blank... 'NO'. 

NOW, mama bear rears her head. This mom has done research and she knows there are other alternatives out there for medication. I asked the doctor about type of blood tests she did on my daughter. Did she check just the T4 or did she look at the T3? When I asked her why she is on a medication to treat a T4 deficiency and we don't know if she has a deficiency there because the test was never done, and maybe the T3 deficiency is what we should look at... the doctor said to me, "IF your daughter had a T3 deficiency she would be retarded."  

THAT sent me over the edge.  First off, who uses the word retarded anymore, let alone a medical professional who deals with CHILDREN.  I honestly needed the grace of God to get through this appointment.  The doctor is snarky, Maddy is screaming and I feel like I am bleeding from a scratch on my forehead.

I then asked the doctor, "WHY did you tell me there weren't any alternative medicines when there is a great one out there that is not synthetic it is natural."

She said, "because your daughter will have the same reaction to that medication as she does the synthroid."

I politely responded, "isn't that my decision to make? I would like you to run the following tests (and I listed them) and I would like you to prescribe her the alternative medication."

The doctor shook her head at me and said, 'I have never prescribed that medication before.'

In which I responded, "this is the time you should prescribe it." She then went on to tell me that my 4 year old is displaying actions of a child who is bipolar and that she would schedule my daughter with a psychiatrist at the university for her to see.  WHY I asked... she responded, because I have several children who have Hashimoto's who also have mental problems.  To which I responded, "do you think it is the medication you prescribe? I would like to try my daughter on an alternative medication before she has a psychological exam that will end up labeling her for life."

I really wanted to scream with Maddy and shake my fist at the doctor... maybe even play cavewoman and bang on my chest to show my superior knowledge or something. LOL Instead, I took a deep breath and waited. And gathered myself. THEN....

The doctor decided that we should try the new medicine.  And that she appreciated my fortitude (she didn't use that exact word, but dang it... fortitude sounds fantastic, right? LOL) --- and she promised to wait for the psyche evaluation until we see how the new medicine works with Maddy.

So, I walked out feeling somewhat victorious and I wait for the results of the appointment.

Then another doctor visit with my son, who has a HUGE wart-like thing on his hand.  We are sitting there and the doctor said that it is NOT a wart that it is this thing called a granuloma and it should be removed and biopsied.  Dear Lord, let me have strength.  My son was a rock star through the procedure.  I held his free hand and had him go through a nursery rhyme with me (ONE TWO... BUCKLE MY SHOE...)  He got through it, I on the other hand almost passed out. LOL

A LOT for us to go through in ONE day.  And we made it through... and a bit stronger than where we started from. 

In the Bible it tells us to be light and salt unto the world.  I always THOUGHT I knew what it meant (be a light amongst the darkness and preserve what you believe in). 

But after a day like I had ... being SALT is more than preserving.  Being salt means healing.  ( I have this cut on the inside of my lip and it hurts.. so I put some salt on it.. and when I woke up the next morning, it was healed. KINDA like that, but more a practice of being salt. LOL) Use your words, your actions to heal not to destroy.  And talking about healing it is not of the physical sense, it is of the emotional sense.  God has called us to be his hands, and his feet... his voice... I am making a point of my life to be a healing kind of salt. 

What does that look like?

Actively listen when spoken to... really focus on what the other person is saying and for me to try and NOT think about my retort.

When someone acts out in anger, counter them with love.  I don't know what my daughter is going through that causes the rages, but I do know I will only try and respond with LOVE and compassion.

Be there. In the moment.  Hold your children when you get the opportunity to now, because someday you won't be able to.

Be more thoughtful.  Really take the time to show caring and concern.  Take time for others.

When someone flips me the bird as they drive by, instead of raising my middle finger back at them, maybe I will shout YES I KNOW I AM #1!!!

Pass the salt.  THIS is important.  It is important to encourage others to pass along the healing power of kindness.  Be a light of the world and the salt of the Earth.... Matthew 5:13-16

Sunday, September 1, 2013

Recipe Time: HOT PIZZA DIP! --- Can we say HELLO, YUMMY???

For those of you who have to "PUT UP" with my crazy experimental cooking, I thank you.

I made this yesterday for a get together at Steve's mama's house.  It was fantastic and I would eat it again and again and again... matter of fact, I am making this again for a shin-dig tomorrow!



2- 8 oz bricks of cream cheese softened
1 1/2 cup pizza sauce
1/2 package of pepperoni diced
1 teaspoon oregano (plus a pinch)
1 teaspoon garlic powder (plus a pinch)
2 cups shredded provolone and mozzarella blend
Crackers or tortilla chips


1) Mix cream cheese with 1 teaspoon of oregano and 1 teaspoon of garlic powder.
2) Spread cream cheese mixture on the bottom of a 9 inch pie pan.
3) Spread pizza sauce over top of cream cheese.
4) Add diced pepperoni to top of sauce (here is where you could also add any of your other favorite pizza toppings--- like black olives, sausage, pepper, onion... OYE YEY!, I thin tomorrow I will make Canadian bacon and pineapple pizza dip! WHAT??)
5) Top with shredded cheese, and sprinkle oregano and garlic on top
6) Bake in the oven at 350 degrees for 20 minutes (until cheese is bubbling on top) OR you can microwave it in a microwave safe dish for 4-6 minutes.

Serve hot with crackers, tortilla chips... maybe even some crusty bread! YEAH!

Now I am getting ready to head to the store for more cream cheese... I think I want (ERR NEED) to make this dip Hawaiian style!

Happy Labor Day!